I’ve always been one of those people who liked having a word of the year, a neatly written list of goals and check boxes to tick off as I make my way through the year. It’s how my brain is wired. More than ever, as I venture into being a writer and running my own business (which really is how I view this) I like having an idea of a theme for the year.
Why? Well, for one it helps me make decisions. When you’re a business owner you have to make A LOT of decisions. You have to sacrifices some things in order to include other things. You have to know when to say yes and when to say no. Guiding principals make these decisions easier, because you have something to align them to.
So, that brings me to 2020. A new decade, new opportunities on the horizon and a string of mistakes fluttering like streamers behind me. Bearing all that in mind, my word for the year is…
TRUST.
I’ll be totally candid right now…trust is not something I give out easy. I learned that about myself this past year. Trust is something I cherish and I hand it out sparingly, not just others but to myself.
That’s right. I had the epiphany that I didn’t really trust myself last year.
And by that I mean I often tried to “out logic” myself even when my gut was strongly telling me which way to go. I always think decisions through, but ultimately I’ve always been a gut feeling kinda gal and I found myself ignoring that instinct last year.
I’d also stopped trusting parts of my writing process (i.e. the fact that I always get lost in the middle of the book, but I have yet to be unable to find my way out eventually…even if it means re-writing and rearranging scenes.) I stopped allowing myself proper thinking time because it felt like a waste to have a day staring into space when I was getting ready to start a new book…which of course meant I lost the feeling of the book and found it much harder to write. Cue more time “wasted” in the long run.
So, lesson learned. In 2020, I am going to trust myself. If something feels wrong, it probably is. If an opportunity doesn’t excite me, the it’ll be a big ol’ no thanks. If I find a person gets my spidey senses tingling, then I’ll pay attention to that.
It also means if a story really grips me then I’m going to let the words come instead of telling myself all the reasons it won’t work. I’m going to trust that I know how to create great characters and tell good stories without letting one negative comment get into my head and stop me feeling creative.
I want 2020 to be my biggest year yet, and that means I need to trust the process. Trust my gut. Trust in myself.